Accepting...

Been rather down, emo & not being my usual self for awhile. Last week wasn't a good week for me at all... Falling sick is one thing, receiving news that are not promising for me is another.

I have always though that I'll be able to get out of my darkest moment soon or easily, but it's overall not as easy as I thought. The frequent/massive amount of drinking seems to becoming a habit for me, or rather addiction? Insomnia seems to becoming my best friend now, accompanying me throughout the night without fail.

Sometimes I feel that maybe there's really some problem with me, or do I have to really use the mind over body method?? I'm slowly accepting the fact that I might really become a "Confession of an alcoholic" soon or have already became...

I just have to accept the fact for lotsa things... Like...
- Life isn't fair
- Hardwork doesn't pay off
- Being nice, u get nothing in return
- Being nice, u'll not be appreciated
- Being too friendly, u'll be associates with being too fake
- Being too fun loving, u might be said as "u're trying too hard"
- I'll stand by u always, doesn't mean others will stand by u as well
- Sharing ur secret, doesn't mean after that, it'll still be a secret

I can go on and on without stopping... But I guess enough example for now. I'm seriously not looking forward to Monday... But there's nothing I can do. Good night world & god bless all of you.

Negative,
Amanda

Sent from my iPhone

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